The Green Goblin and the Joker are two psychotic grinning and laughing supervillains. However, who gets the last laugh?
The Fight[]
In the sprawling metropolis of New York City, the streets were alive with the usual cacophony of blaring horns, chattering pedestrians, and the distant wail of sirens. High above the gridlock and the grit, perched on a gargoyle of the Gothic spire, the Joker revelled in the chaos of his new playground. Bored with the incessant game of cat-and-mouse with his good old nemesis Batman, the Clown Prince of Crime hungered for a fresh adversary to entertain his twisted sense of humor. The eternal darkness of Gotham had shaped his devious escapades; however, the shiny allure of The Big Apple promised him the golden opportunity to break a new hero—a certain wall-crawler known for his bright red and blue tights.
With a malevolent grin plastered across his grotesquely painted face, the Joker concocted a sinister plan to ensnare Spider-Man in his web of anarchy. He'd been meticulous, placing explosives across various locations in the dense jungle of concrete, each bomb marked personally with the infamous Joker emblem. His prisoners, a motley crew of civilians chosen at random, whimpered pitifully through their gags, bound tortuously to each other, their eyes wide with terror beneath the fluorescent lights of the abandoned warehouse.
"Oh, stop your squirming!" the Joker chastised gleefully, twirling his purple cane adorned with a laughing skull. "You're all acting like a bunch of spoiled children!" His laughter echoed abominably, bouncing off the grimy walls, a chilling harbinger of doom.
But before his ghastly guffaws could subside, an unexpected turn of events refracted through shards of broken glass showering from above. The hostages flinched as a figure burst through the window, a cackling green silhouette astride a menacing glider—the Green Goblin had arrived.
"I thought I heard someone terrorizing my city," the Green Goblin declared, his voice dripping with malevolence as he surveyed the room through the twisted grimace of his mask. His own brand of madness sparkled from his unhinged eyes, an equal match for the Joker's madness.
"Awww," the Joker cooed with mock disappointment, "I thought this was a free country! I thought we could do what we want!"
"Indeed, it is," the Green Goblin retorted, his demented smile curving beneath his grotesque mask. "But this is *my* city, and only I can terrorize these vermin!"
As swiftly as a striking serpent, the Goblin hurled a pumpkin bomb directly at the Joker, the device spiraling through the air with its eery glows and whines. The Joker danced aside with deceptive agility, his unsettling laughter contrasting with the growing intensity of the Green Goblin's howls.
"You may not be the Bat, or that web-slinging nuisance I was looking forward to drench in madness," the Joker admitted, flicking his wrist to reveal a detonator from his sleeve, "but I suppose you could keep me company until the main event begins!"
With a whimsical grin, the Joker pressed the button. The hostages’ explosive restraints began to blink faster, a silent countdown to catastrophe.
"Try to get out of this if you can!" the Joker cried, cutting through the industrial glass pane with a swift kick and propelling himself into the night sky with a flourish of his cleverly disguised parachute.
"Oh, no you don’t!" bellowed the Green Goblin, his predatory gaze fixing on the Joker. He punched the throttle of his Goblin Glider and soared through the broken window, engaging in the aerial pursuit. His razor-sharp Goblin Stars tore through the parachute’s fabric, causing the Joker’s graceful descent to become a frenzied plummet. Yet, by some uncanny twist of luck, or perhaps sheer madness, the Joker survived the crash landing.
"What?" the Goblin articulated, his shock morphing rapidly into renewed insanity. "Impossible!"
"I'm the Joker!" the villain retorted with pride, limping to his feet amongst scattered debris. "I always survive!" His clothes, a patchwork of purple and green, were torn, but his spirit remained unbroken.
The Goblin's laughter pealed like a cracked bell. "Alright then, Joker. Let's see just how resilient you really are." He advanced menacingly, his Goblin Glider casting a long, ominous shadow under the lurid glow of the streetlights.
The two villains clashed in the night, a surreal dance of madness above the unaware city below. The Joker, though seemingly outmatched by the Goblin's technological prowess, was a maestro of unpredictability. As they grappled atop the glider, the Joker revealed his acid-squirting boutonniere, unleashing its toxic cloud into the Goblin's face. Unfazed, the Goblin revealed his own adaptations—protective lenses and filters designed for chemical warfare.
"How did you shrug that off?" the Joker queried, maddened curiosity lining his voice.
"Maybe because I am immune to such petty tricks!" the Green Goblin roared back.
The Joker, desperate and cunning, brandished his knife, slashing at the Goblin with venomous precision. He managed to nick the flesh beneath the suit—a suit, the Joker noted with intrigue. "So you're wearing a mask, huh? Why does everyone love masks so much?" he jeered.
The battle raged, playing out like a violent ballet, until the Joker saw his chance. With swift malice, he plunged his knife into the glider's mechanisms, tearing through wiring and gears with a gleeful chuckle. His momentum carried him into a calculated roll as the crippled Goblin and his glider collided with a nearby wall in a shower of sparks.
Stripped of his aerial advantage, the Green Goblin stalked through the dissipating cloud of smoke, intent on finishing the job. But the Joker, mercurial as ever, was already initiating his next move. Leaping with crazed determination, he clambered onto the Goblin's back, his wild laughter shattering the silence.
Gripping the mask, the Joker tore it clear, unveiling not the scarred visage of a hardened criminal, but the familiar face beneath. "...Lex?" the Joker queried, his jesting tone laced with genuine surprise, despite the man's distinct differences from the Metropolis tycoon. "Sporting some unusual hair fashion, are we?"
"No, you fool," the man responded in a crisp, poised tone, "My name is Norman Osborn, and you've just made a *BIG* mistake!" Norman's hands were lightning quick, seizing the Joker by his neck in a vise grip before delivering an uppercut that sent him airborne. Once suspended, the Joker found himself the target of Goblin's razor-sharp projectiles, pinning him cruelly against a tank leaking explosive fluid.
Norman Osborn advanced with the ruthless determination of a hunter closing in on wounded prey, delivering a barrage of brutal strikes to the pinned Joker. As pummel followed pummel, it seemed the Joker's fate was sealed—he appeared paralyzed, breaths shallow and labored, death seemingly inches away.
"Seriously," the Joker coughed a laugh through bloodied lips, maintaining his twisted grin, "are you some kind of rip-off of me or something?"
Norman paused, considering the Green Goblin mask that lay discarded nearby. A sly smile curled at his lips as he donned it once more, his voice transforming back to the chilling cackle of the Green Goblin. "I prefer the term…" Norman articulated, pausing for dramatic effect, "...Upgrade."
With the drama of a grand finale, the Green Goblin prepared to dispatch his adversary once and for all, extracting a glistening pumpkin bomb from his arsenal. In the end, it wasn't the Joker who got the last laugh, but the Goblin, as the Joker vaporized in an instant and left no trace of his existence behind.
The Goblin then walks off into the horizon, preparing for his next move with the web-slinger while giggling with glee.
Winner[]
Green Goblin comes out on top.